Admirers

I don’t know what’s wrong with my bottom
For which I was once well renowned
I’m totally baffled, needs ropes and a scaffold
to heave it back up from the ground

It used to be just about perfect
like a succulent ripe summer peach
but it’s flabby and pale and I look like a whale
that’s been washed up on Omaha beach

And someone has stolen my tummy
They’ve taken the old one and fled
I had such a slim waist, but its now been replaced
and I’ve got Pavarotti’s instead

I used to have queues of keen suitors
who would gaze at my bottom in awe
they’d tease and they’d flirt, but they now just divert
to the girl in short skirts, just next door

So I’m now sitting here at the clinic
for a nip and a tuck and a lift
with their intervention, and clever suspension
I’m hoping recovery’s swift…

© Jan Jack 2007

Admirers   A visit to the zoo  I wish things were different  When I was a girl  A cat we called muff